Lakes Of Fire -- my first Burning Man event ever -- turned me inside out.

Then back, but better. Totally rebooted my system. Defragmented everything.

Entered the greeter's station and was told "Welcome Home." That phrase, her voice, is camping out inside me now.

Made new friends by NOT knowing how to set up a sun canopy. Indeed, the gods -- some bearing dreads, strong hands and cowries, others bearing stakes, strong advice and margueritas -- are everywhere.

Walked lightly on the land, brought all my garbage home to my own dumpster in my own alley. Decided it's time to start teaching my son the REAL reasons I hate littering. And it's NOT just about him making more for me to clean up.

Watched J. climb a tree with other kids. 5 times without a scratch or poison ivy or a tick (no offense, Tick Townies.) Started to feel okay about other parents watching him a few minutes at a time. Can’t stop thinking about Amy traveling sooo much with her son. Surely there is a lot I can learn from her about balancing the single-parent thing AND being a whole woman. Wanted to cry when I woke up Sunday and saw they were gone.

Was freed of my Friday night depression by a mom (Kat, I thank you!) convincing J. Saturday afternoon to go explore the Big Ship across camp with me. If it hadn't been for her, I fear J. would have never let me get off our "block" of 6 families around Traffic Light Camp.

Realized his control over my life isn't his "fault" or due to my own bad childhood -- it just wound up this way. And I can change it if I really pay attention more to my own needs, not just his.

And so I have just booked my flights for a nice long trip to the playa without him, with plenty of time to prepare him and not sure exactly how he and my ex-husband will do without me! But they will be okay. A lot of good surprises can happen -- if I'm honest to the right people about what I need.

Learned that the somewhat-Madonna-styled poet in a silk white corset (and little else) seemed a lot like me on the inside. Learned that a very plainly dressed woman was an incredibly skilled fire dancer, a true artist. Decided to stop worrying about whether I dress wild or plain when I perform. Together, those 2 performers were inspiring and comforting to me beyond belief.

Silently said thank you to DD and the pizza loft, even though I couldn’t take advantage of it, while carrying my J. home at midnight after the Burn.

On the way out, I got hugged by a naked lady. It didn’t feel weird. And recognized by a fellow poet who heard me perform Saturday pre-Burn and appreciated my work.

Seen, heard, accepted, appreciated. How long have I been looking for these things? How long have MOST of us?

When we got home, J. decided to spend the rest of the day naked -- with a glowstick necklace. And not only did I spend the rest of the day wearing a scarf for a dress, I managed to hoop for 4 minutes straight. First time since I was his age.

Watched my video of the Burn. Un freaking believable.

Showed J. my video of him with Stella. Just beginning to realize how much Bill's poet/child family meant to me. Hoping this was just the beginning.

Told my ex how relieved and happy it felt to discover J. and I were NOT the only Black folks there! Giving thanks, feeling renewed, feeling whole, giving thanks.

Decompressed already? You’re kidding, right?? In May my studio hard drive crashed and I lost all the music I’ve EVER recorded (except what was mixed and online somewhere already.) So I’ve been rethinking my whole path as an artist. And following (*gasp*) a folk singer named Joe Pug around as inspiration towards a simpler, powerful way to express, perform, be.

Then I attend my first (*anxious…*) Burning Man event. The consolidation, the learning, the re-creation of my spirit has just, JUST gotten started.

Abortion Doctor Killed


Dr. George Tiller was assassinated while in church in Wichita, Kan., on Sunday, May 31st, targeted for legally performing abortions. His death might have been prevented simply through enforcement of existing laws.

The 67 year old doctor faced constant threats and incidents of violence and vandalism including a previous assassination attempt in 1993. Dr. Tiller’s clinic is one of just three in the nation performing late-term abortions after the twenty-first week of pregnancy. Tiller is the eighth abortion provider to be killed since 1977.

Democracy Now! speaks with longtime colleagues of Dr. Tiller, plays excerpts of Dr. Tiller’s 2008 address to the Feminist Majority Foundation, and hears from an abortion provider at a nearby clinic who says he warned the FBI of suspect Scott Roeder just days before Tiller was killed.

(For these complete articles and audio go to
http://www.democracynow.org/features/abortion_doctor_killed)

Amy Goodman’s Column: Dr. George Tiller Didn’t Have to Die
The death of Dr. Tiller might have been prevented simply through enforcement of existing laws. His alleged killer was seen vandalizing a Kansas City clinic, Aid for Women, both the week before and the day before the murder, putting glue into its door locks. The manager of that clinic, who calls himself “Jeff Pederson” to protect his identity, told me he called the FBI and local police both times, but the vandal, the alleged killer Scott Roeder, was not arrested.

Amy Goodman’s Column: Listen to this Column

June 10, 2009: Family of Slain Abortion Provider Dr. George Tiller Announces Permanent Closure of Wichita Clinic
The family of murdered abortion provider Dr. George Tiller has announced the permanent closure of his Wichita, Kansas clinic, eliminating one of the few medical practices in the country that performed late-term abortions. We speak with a close friend of Dr. Tiller’s, Dr. Warren Hern, who is one of the last doctors in the country to perform late-term abortions. We’re also joined by a genetic counselor critical of her group, the National Society of Genetic Counselors, for not putting out a public statement condemning Dr. Tiller’s murder.

June 03, 2009: Abortion Clinic Manager Reveals He Warned FBI of Suspect in Murder of Dr. George Tiller, Says Killing Could Have Been Avoided
We speak to the manager of a Kansas City abortion clinic who says he twice told the FBI last week about the suspect in the murder of abortion provider Dr. George Tiller, including the day before the killing. The suspect, Scott Roeder, vandalized the Aid for Women clinic by locking its doors shut. Using the pseudonym “Jeff Pederson” to protect his identity, the clinic manager says Tiller’s death could have been avoided had the FBI acted on his warnings.

June 03, 2009: ‘This Shouldn’t Have Been Ignored’: Tiller Colleague Dr. Susan Robinson Reacts to News FBI Was Warned on Suspected Killer
Days before she heads back to Wichita for her colleague Dr. George Tiller’s funeral, Dr. Susan Robinson reacts to the news that another abortion clinic had warned the FBI of the suspect in Tiller’s killing.

June 03, 2009: Tiller Killing Spurs Renewed Calls for US to Reverse Longstanding Passivity on Anti-Abortion Extremists
To many critics, the murder of Dr. George Tiller, the eighth abortion provider to be killed since 1977, highlights the US government’s refusal to take seriously the threat of domestic right-wing, anti-abortion extremists. We speak to author and journalist Frederick Clarkson, who has written extensively on anti-abortion violence, and Chip Berlet, senior analyst at Political Research Associates and co–author of Right-Wing Populism in America: Too Close for Comfort.

June 03, 2009: In 2008 Speech, Dr. Tiller Outlined Views that Underpinned Lifelong Commitment to Reproductive Rights
We play an excerpt from a March 2008 speech by Dr. George Tiller before the Feminist Majority Foundation. Discussing his vision for a just and more humane society, Dr. Tiller said, “We’ve given war, pestilence, hate, greed, judgment, ego, self-sufficiency a good try, and it failed. We need a new paradigm that consists of kindness, courtesy, justice, love and respect in all our relationships.”

June 01, 2009: Dr. George Tiller (1941-2009): Murdered Abortion Provider Remembered for Lifelong Dedication to Women’s Reproductive Health
Supporters of reproductive rights are mourning the killing of the abortion provider Dr. George Tiller. The sixty-seven-year-old Tiller was shot Sunday as he attended services at his Wichita, Kansas church. The gunman fled the scene, but a suspect was later caught in a Kansas City suburb. The suspect, fifty-one-year-old Scott Roeder, has a history of involvement in anti-abortion activism and was once arrested and jailed on explosives charges.

Emergency responses to the murder of Dr. Tiller:

June 1, 2009 Chicago: Barely a month after Barack Obama spoke at Notre Dame and called for finding "common ground" with Christian fascists and women-haters on the issue of abortion, Dr. George Tiller, one of the few doctors in the country to openly and publicly perform late-term abortions, was gunned down while attending Sunday services in Wichita, Kansas. Dr. Tiller was widely known as a courageous, caring man who stood uncompromisingly - even in the face of death threats, bombings, trumped up legal investigations and prosecutions, and attempts on his life - in support of the right of any woman, in any circumstances, to choose whether or not to have an abortion. The assassination of such a hero to the people as Dr. Tiller - and the attempt to deny women the medical care he provided - brought people into the streets across the country to honor his service to the people and to stand up defiantly after his murder to boldly call for

"Abortion on Demand and Without Apology!" We gathered in downtown Chicago the day after Dr. Tiller's murder for a tribute rally and march.

More pictures of the protest here and here.

Video of protest here.

Coverage of other actions around the country at worldcantwait.org.